Officially, the diagnosis:
- ADHD (inattentive sub-type)
- a second cognitive issue that could not be diagnosed
To me, “inattentive sub-type” is a junk description. “Attention Regulation” is my problem re ADHD.
ADHD is helpful to go find help resources, but it is a junk label otherwise.
What I experience:
Every thing is grabbing my attention. Everything is a shiny object or a … SQUIRREL ! And every thing is interesting.
Sensory overload, all of the time. I perceive everything all of the time: the heat from that light bulb over there, the motion of every hair on my arm when there is a breeze, the smell and taste of my coffee, all of the objects in the room. Every thing is being picked up by one or more of my senses all of the time.
Cognitive overload, all of the time. Because every little thing is connected to every other thing, with pretty much just one level of separation between a thought and the next thought.
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And cognitive overload (processing every thing) compounded by every thing being interesting and by processing of all the sensory stuff.
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And physical ailments (discomforts) that add to sensory overload and cognitive overload, all of the time.
I find peace/calm/sanity in things that help me stay focused (in which I can immerse myself), that have well defined and visible structure, that do not have moving distractions, that do not have me playing a game of “Where’s Waldo”, that do not have hidden (or hard to notice) interfaces, that allow me to see more detail without losing the big picture, that don’t have me bouncing from page to page (i.e. I have an anchor).
OMG the Talk.TiddlyWiki editor sucks. I do not suffer well lack of a WYSIWYG editor. I only accept that in TiddlyWiki when intertwingularity must yield to my slicing and dicing will.